Chasing my dreams!

When I felt like I was lost and adrift in the world of adulthood, I did some research into my astrology chart to find anything that could give me purpose. While I’m still not sure if the stars dictate my entire life path, I did find that my Virgo Jupiter in the 12th house allegedly meant that I am not only a perfectionist in what I choose to put out into the world, but I am also terribly afraid of failure. I am totally willing to blame all of my insecurity complexes on the placement of the planets on the day I was born, but I also think if I want to succeed in life, I’m going to have to take some responsibility for chasing my dreams.

When I first started this blog, I was mainly focused on having something to call my own. I knew it would be good on my resume to have these personal mini-essays on a platform that I owned, financed, and designed mainly on my own, with the help of my ever lovely mother. While I do still think all of that is true, I’m looking for something bigger.

I’m not exactly looking for validation because I know that I’m good at this and I’m constantly working to become better. What I am looking for is a way to reach a broader range of people. I want people from around New York City, across the country, and someday, maybe even the world, to see themselves in my work. I don’t think that I’m better or more special than anyone else, but I do believe I have a gift of making people feel seen and understood. While I won’t ever meet every single person in the world, I can see myself in almost all of humanity. We all have the same needs, the same hope for something bigger than ourselves, the same desire to achieve our wildest dreams. 

I won’t be haughty and pretend like I am not utterly terrified of embarking on this journey, but I am the only person standing between myself and my dreams. I’ve been my harshest critic for a long time, and I’m tired of not chasing what I want because of an insecurity not rooted in any form of reality. I know I can really connect with people through my writing. There’s no time like the present; if I don’t take this step towards what I want now, I don’t think I ever will. I’m making the choice to be brave today, and I encourage you all to do the same!

Lots of love always, 

malaika <3